Evie spent the next couple of days on life support. The doctors had decided to let Everly’s body rest and recover a bit before they attempted to remove her off of the vent again.
Aaron and I sat by her bedside all day only leaving to eat. Although Evie was unconscious most of the time I wanted to be sure to be there when she opened her eyes. As Sunday night approached Aaron and I started to become increasingly anxious. Monday was the day they were going to attempt to remove her off the ventilator. I knew we needed to get her off of it but I was afraid that she would go into cardiac arrest again. I wondered how many times a heart can go through something like that.
Unfortunately, time doesn’t stand still for anybody not even for the cutest babies. Monday morning had arrived and I was a wreck. I can’t even explain what it’s like waking up knowing that your baby might die today it was incomprehensible. I don’t even remember anything that happened that morning up to the point of removing the vent. As the doctors, nurses and respiratory therapist gathered round Aaron and I left. I walked out of the PICU and into the hallway. I felt like there was a million pounds on my chest. My eyes started to well up. At that very moment only a hundred feet away our daughter could be dying. After only ten minutes the PICU doors opened and a nurse walked out, she smiled and that’s when I knew, everything went well.
Everly was put back on the CPAP a familiar and welcoming sight. After 4 days they started to wean her off her pain medications but she quickly began exhibiting signs of addiction: restlessness, sweating and general irritability. They decided to give her methadone multiple times a day to help with her addiction.
On the 5th day post-surgery things started to look a little brighter. They slowly started removing wires and tubes from Evie and she started acting a little bit more herself. One thing the PICU had that the NICU didn’t was a TV. One day I was watching Friends and I noticed her watching it too. Turns out she’s like most kids she loves watching TV. I put it on Sprout and they were playing a show called Ruff-Ruff, Tweet and Dave we had never heard of it before but something about it caught Evie’s attention and to this day it’s her favorite show.
One week after the surgery I got a call at home. Whenever the hospitals phone number popped up on my phone I instantly held my breath, I never knew what kind of news was on the other side. It was her doctor she called to let us know that Everly was doing so well that they moved her back into the NICU. It was my favorite kind of news, the good kind!
We had know idea but we were finally on the other side of the storm. Soon our baby would feel the sun for the very first time!
Breath In, Breath Out. 